They say women are the most confusing creatures on Earth.
We either express too much or we are too cold. The woman who expresses too much is called out to be over-emotional but when the same woman speaks less it arises curiosity in the perception of others.
Whenever I read on Facebook forums, talk to my girlfriends or stranger women crying in the subway, I always wonder why she doesn’t deserve the person who made her cry. We girls have the same stories to share of heartbreaks but I wonder what is one thing that makes us go through the common experience.
Well, there is no denying the fact that sometimes a woman wants to fix another person in a way that he could really see through us. Sometimes a woman loves so hard, for her love to be seen and admired. She tries and tries, loves them every day in a hope that she get back the love. But sometimes loving someone also means freeing the person from the emotion that is empty for him.
When a woman tries to keep a man she loves unconditionally irrespective of the same in return, she does it to preserve the best memories of the person in her heart. Her heart knows how much it desires for the man but her heart also gets tired of the repeated desire. Every day she finds small things to keep the love going. A small text from her man, a sense of attention, even a little laugh on his face. She looks at him in a way that she is waiting for one moment of reassurance where she forgets everything and believes in their connection. She tries until she feels empty.
This time she leaves for herself. She leaves for herself because she has emptied her heart by showering love. She realizes it is 100 times more difficult to fall in love with her again if she loses herself in pursuit of a man. She starts from scratch. Starts filling the void her precious person has left in her heart. But mind it, it takes so much to fill that void. This time she doesn’t fill it with another man or another empty connection, this time she fills it with self-love. She is setting boundaries for her now in a way that a man who truly deserves her will have to respect it. She doesn’t complain anymore about why she is unlovable because now she knows in a world full of needs she has to be her cheerleader. Now she walks in street, looks at the couples holding a hand, and smiles thinking of the person she loves but the memory doesn’t bring her heartache. She plays her favorite song and looks at the world differently where there is no room of feeling pity for herself. When a woman learns to love herself she no longer craves a man who could make her feel important, she seeks a partner who is ready to walk through struggles with her.
And when a woman finally gets herself back she won’t come back to the man who emptied her. She is still in love with him, her heart is happy to remember the old memories but she won’t have him back in her life. Her heart which was innocent to fall in love with promises, big words has become smart to differentiate between life long and temporary. A woman who loves someone deeply also learns to rise again without him.